Final Exam
Section IV: Essay
Snorkels are designed to transport air beneath the surface of water so that a diver may breathe oxygen while submerged. Why, then, did the Snorks, being anaerobic water-breathers, need snorkels atop their heads? Discuss the existence of Snorks as a manifestation of the form-over-function/style-over-substance zeitgeist that fueled mass-marketed children’s entertainment during the 1980s, and also how they were just second-rate Smurfs, anyway.
Obviously, though, the Snorks were nothing compared to the Wuzzles (note: clicking link will lead to sweet theme music). My ideal wuzzle would probably be either half shark and half leopard ("Sharkard" -- able to hunt large sea creatures and then drag them into trees to keep the hyenas from stealing the carcass) or half octupus and half polar bear ("Polar Puss" -- would have the octupus's color change properties, suction cups, and arms while maintining the polar bear's general awesomeness). But if I had to choose from existing Wuzzles, it's pretty easy: Hoppopotamus.
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