Rebecca (Becky) Sanchez Guest Blog: How-to "Pull-a-Johnny" and go for Special Olympics Gold

I think I can safely say that The Ringer is probably the worst movie I have never seen in my entire life. Despite my general repugnance, countless trailers have got me wondering several things: What are the standards for qualifying as retarded in order to compete in The Special Olympics and how might one feign retardness? and, Is it just me, or is this the most offensive idea for a feature film since Cher's Mask.

According to the official Special Olympics website, "A person is considered to have an intellectual disability for purposes of determining his or her eligibility to participate in Special Olympics if that person satisfies any one of the following requirements:

The person has been identified by an agency or professional as having an intellectual disability as determined by their localities. [So, in this case, a friend-of-the-family doctor could be your golden ticket] The person has a cognitive delay, as determined by standardized measures such as intelligent quotient or "IQ" testing or other measures that are generally accepted within the professional community in that Accredited Program's nation as being a reliable measurement of the existence of a cognitive delay. [This is probably the easiest way to feign intellectual disability, simply go in and fail an IQ test.]

The person has a closely related developmental disability. A "closely related developmental disability" means having functional limitations in both general learning (such as IQ) and in adaptive skills (such as in recreation, work, independent living, self-direction, or self-care).
However, persons whose functional limitations are based solely on a physical, behavioral, or emotional disability, or a specific learning or sensory disability, are not eligible to participate as Special Olympics athletes. [So, while Leonardo DiCaprio's character from Gilbert Grape would
be eligible, Rainman and Kevin Spacy in the Usual Suspects would not.]

Although it may prove relatively simple to "Pull a Johnny" and feign retardedness in order to fix the Special Olympics, there is relatively little to "fix." To the best of my knowledge, the winners receive no cash prizes. However, like The Ringer, you may reap the serendipitous, yet invaluable reward of discovering what it truly means to be "Special." In regards to the film's offensiveness, it may surprise you that The Special Olympics actually endorses the film.

(Note: This is not Dustin Hoffman as "Rainman" but rather a semi-pro wrestler by the same name)

The Special Olympics President and Chairman released a statement affirming, "The film projects the commonality of all people, showing people with intellectual disabilities as more alike than different. Laughing at a person and laughing with a person are very different forms of humor, and it is our belief that this comedy will give audiences the chance to laugh with Special Olympics athletes while appreciating their joy and wisdom. Equally importantly, we believe that the stigmas presented in the early scenes of the movie will be seen as folly by the end of The Ringer." More than 150 individuals with intellectual disabilities appeared in the film.