i read slate so you don't have to

I would imagine that everyone who reads this blog is only here because they've finished everything (everything) on Slate (even that newish "has-been" thing that I haven't bothered to check out yet -- is it just Kausfiles with less formatting or is it actually good?). But, in case I'm wrong, here's what you should read before you ever think about coming back here:

Your Children Will Die From SuperHeroin!!!
I don't really write about media criticism that much, since I figure that if you're someone who wants to read media criticism you're probably pretty aware of media bullshit anyway. But I'm always really amused by the MSM's (yes, I just wrote MSM, my blogosphere membership card should be in the mail right about now) coverage of drugs. Amazingly alarmist, pretty inaccurate, and about 9-20 months behind the curve. This Jack Shafer piece discusses the recent coverage of heroin-related deaths in New York. He also links to this exceptionally stupid article about crystal meth:

Crystal meth is a stimulant, but because it destroys brain cells at such a rapid rate, its users are drawn to menial, repetitive activities.

I am not a doctor, and science scares me, but this doesn't seem to make any sense at all. You want to do menial and repetitive tasks because brain cells are being killed? So the process of brain cells dying makes you want to vacuum? That can't be right.

Who Are All These Greek Starlet-Fuckers?
Come to think of it, I have been hearing a lot about Greek shipping magnates recently. One of them is dating the cokey Olsen. The Explainer tells us why:

As of 2001, Greek companies owned around 3,000 merchant vessels -- more than any other country and about 18 percent of the world's fleet. The Greeks have been maritime traders for millennia, but the modern prominence of their shipping industry dates from the end of World War II.

Put That Camera Away! Seriously!
Dahlia Lithwick has John Roberts pegged:

I know this because I knew guys like him in college and at law school; we all knew guys like him. These were the guys who were certain, by age 19, that they couldn't smoke pot, or date trampy girls, or throw up off the top of the school clock tower because it would impair their confirmation chances. They would have done all these things, but for the possibility of being carved out of the history books for it.