successories

Today's Wall Street Journal has a little piece about corporate slogans and branding and how ridiculous these efforts can sometimes be:

That's the problem with slogans and other internal branding efforts. They mean to sharpen focus but end up as emblems of corporate wishful thinking, objects of satire, and indicators of how clueless upper management is and how childish supervisors think their employees are.

I think a major issue with these branding efforts is that they're just not really true. You're boss doesn't really want you to "Dare to be Different." He wants you to deliver your reports on time for once and then go take your 3pm shit. Before my interview with Greenberg Traurig (a pretty good law firm) I got a recruiting brochure in the mail. This is pretty normal, as most law firms try (mostly unsuccessfully) to differentiate themselves from the others. But this was not like the other brochures. This was hardback-bound in lime green and filled with drawings and slogans [link is to a pdf] meant to illustrate what I should aspire to if I wanted to be a GT lawyer. These were Greenberg Traurig's "New Rules."

You're not a "yes" person, you're a "yes I can" person.

You don't want to be one of the herd, you're rather be one of the heard.

Ummm, sorta. I don't think it's my rugged individualism that is driving me to apply for legal jobs. Anyway, the interview went poorly and GT rejected me. Here's an excerpt from their letter: "We have had an overwhelming interest in our nationwide summer program and our 'New Rules' culture, so much so that we have had to make some difficult decisions." OK, Greenberg Traurig. First, you completely stole your brand identity from Bill Maher. Second, stop marketing to me in a goddamn rejection letter. Finally, if there was actually a surge of interest in your summer program, I guarantee it had nothing to do with your "Rules." But, of course, I am not much of a "yes I can" person.