Somehow my life has gotten to the point where I like to start my mornings with Matt and Katie, so I had the unique pleasure of seeing the Tom Cruise interview as it happened. These guys were clearly as impressed with Cruise's knowledge of the history of Ritalin, psychiatry, depression, communications, glibness, and morning shows as I was, so they took the time to document the other fields in which Tom Cruise is a recognized expert.
On rocket science:
I know for a fact that if you can perform a high-enough level audit, you can fly. I fly all the time. The first time I flew my heterosexual girlfriend Penelope Cruz crapped her pants.
On race:
I can prove to you that you don't have to be black. Being black is a state of being caused by Black Thetans, which create negativity and melotonin in the skin--you can audit blackness right out of your body forever. Really. I know this because I used to be black...
[via Defamer]
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