Even more than typical wedge issues like abortion and gay marriage, people's feelings towards horses seem to be polarizing our nation. On the one hand, you have people like this:
Perhaps the most lurid detail she added, however, was that when they searched the farm, police had found hundreds of hours of videotape showing men having sex with horses. Police are still making sure that sex was not forced on the smaller, weaker animals, thus constituting animal cruelty (which is a crime).That's right. These people were having consensual, romantic sex with horses at a little farmhouse getaway. Cruelty!? Not a chance. These people just love horses.
Then you have people like this:
NICE SHOES ASSHOLE!!He's clearly not a fan of horses or their shoes.
Hey! I have an idea! How about I nail a hat to your head and some pants to your ass? How about I nail a toilet to your big uncontrollable asshole?
No, wait, I have a better idea, why don't we nail some contact lenses in your stupid big black eyes.
Luck my ass. The only thing lucky about you stupid gay ass horse is that I'm not there this instant with my nail gun. Oh, you'd like that wouldn't you. BECAUSE YOU'RE AN IDIOT!!
REALLY FUCKING GENIUS WHEN YOU HAVE TO NAIL YOUR CLOTHES TO YOUR RETARDED ASS!!
It's up to greater men than me to figure out how to unite the Two Americas when there are those who want consensual buttsex with horses and those who want to shoot them in the head with a nailgun. Luckily, we at least know where sharks come down on this controversy.
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